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Male, 31 years old
Transistional, Existence, Eastern US

  Offline - Last On: 14hrs ago

43 Buddies
47 Subscribers
15,769 Profile Views
24,668 Posts | Member Since: 10/30/2008
Link to this profile:

welt am draht (animal collective remix) pantha du prince
...


Interests: Dogs / Dating / Cats / Hunting / Fashion
Homepage: (None)
Birthday:6/11/1988 (31 Years Old)
IM Type: (Decline to State) IM Name:
Occupation: find me
Marital Status: (Decline to State)
Sexual Preference: Straight
Religion: Christian
Politics: Moderate
Fav. Movie: in
Fav. TV Show: my
Fav. Book: field of grass
Fav. Song: mother
Fav. Food: nature`s
Fav. Car: son
Active Journal Entries | Archived Journal Entries

It’s like words. Don’t disengage. This is about books. - Mood:Good
Thursday November 14 201912:20:41 PM |
I’m terrible about books lately. I’m a thief mostly.

So I’m partially in the middle of...

Leaves of Grass. Which is forgiveable. I read the long form intros and am laying off on the collection.

Against The Day. Pynchon is just too brutal. I’ll get back to it but that’s the one that really has my brain jammed up.

Invisible Nation. About the Kurds. Also tough and upsetting. Got to the real recent history. Was written prior to ISIS. Just misery.

Our Band Could Be Your Life. Also forgiveable. I cared about Sonic Youth’s story but haven’t listened to the Butthole Surfers. That’s just back on the shelf.

Briefly picked up Aristotle and Kandinsky stuff. Couldn’t stomach mind warping. Didn’t really give it a shot this time.

But now I’m committed. Like literally insane. No I’m just.

I got a new book that I’m interested in. Should be nice and dry and informative.

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Slight groom from time to time but mostly just hair growth November - Mood:Good
Wednesday November 06 201911:05:18 AM |
Should I post a link to a No Shave November fundraiser? I don’t think anyone would donate. But this is my thread for it...

Screw it.

https://no-shave.org/member/Coswald88

There’s the link.

But am I wrong or is YT slowing more than usual lately? Is discord cutting off traffic that severely? I still prefer this format because I’m a self indulgent blowhard but...

Really though. Ghost town.

Did I mention my parents are traveling in Europe? That’s neat isn’t it.

I’m just still scaring myself by taking a hit or two of weed on the weekends and worrying myself sick that somehow I’m going to get fired for it.

Hope everyone likes hair on face...

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Destructo. I’m going to start calling myself destructo. - Mood:Good
Friday November 01 201912:04:38 AM |
So for a spell I was here while I was working as an engineer. Office excel jockey administrative type big data go f*ck yourself if you ask me a question kind of environment. It was challenging because I have small brain syndrome. Not that I’m stupid but I’m just another small brain like the rest of y’all small brains. So it didn’t materialize from contract work to full time position. It was awful and I had to learn to grow from being fed my own misery.

But anyway. Somewhat more on the up and up with my back still heavy laden.

But news!

They shut down that facility. Or they are in the process of shutting down that facility.

So did I win? Or did I lose?

Is it possible that in my short time there I infected enough people with small brain theory that it ceased to function properly. I prodded. I adjusted. Maybe I turned something off that should have been on?

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Blank journal entry. - Mood:Good
Saturday October 19 20191:52:31 AM |
So is this really what I should do? It’s late. It’s Friday. I have had too many in an empty stomach.

What am I trying to accomplish?

I’m here though. I’m here and I’m waiting o having another. Another confusion. Another delirium.

I’m just not sure if ion right in this.


I usually havr dinner on Friday. I have a beer or two. I step out for a smoke. And I see that the bar is closed. I had no food and went to the bar. It was had people and now I’m drunk. What does it mean?


I’m just tired but I want food.

What was dinner for you?

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I get to the bottom and I go back to the top of the slide. - Mood:Good
Friday October 11 201911:45:06 AM |
I’m more mature this month. By about two three hundred dollars. Which is nice. I’ve spent a lot less.

The work week was like one of those log rides at an amusement park. Not the long waiting part where you go to the top of the slide. But just busy busy busy until yesterday where I splashed into a tepid pool of realizing that productivity in one area had caused work to pile up somewhere else. So that was like the tepid pool of chlorine that I found myself wallowing in yesterday.

So I think today I’ll probably have time to start the slow climb back into the position of going down the slide again.

I’ve got blisters on my fingers.

Did anyone else have a chilly fall week that was actually mostly sunny and pleasant?

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Please don’t ban me. - Mood:Good
Thursday October 03 201911:51:02 PM |
It’s a brand new day. I am possible of sitting by myself with cheap beer and Sportscenter. I am possible of not spending a hundred dollars every other weekend. I am possible of netting positive.

Probable. I might even be probable.

But related and unrelated.

Work is impossible to expect in my line of work. And that’s my major lesson as of late. I think I still have to fight the struggle for routine. I don’t know. I think every time routine shifts something gets accomplished.

I’m just worried because a project that I didn’t inspect for a couple days went south in a hurry.

This was last news of the night stuff.

I hate last news of the night stuff. It doesn’t hit me until I’m home and suddenly I’m too angry to enjoy my beer.

Okay.

Stressful job stuff. When was the last time you yelled at someone at work? I haven’t in a while. Third shift lady usually gets the brunt of it.

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Money money money monkey... money - Mood:Overwhelmed
Saturday September 21 20191:45:54 PM |
I’m feeling increasingly settled. Which is causing increasing boredom. I like my job. I like my apartment. I’m in touch with family for support. The tired routine of stressing every month’s bills away is what bogs me down.

But I did stuff this week. I programmed parts. I carried in wood. I survived my paranoid tendencies.

Maybe I have to transition into overtime mode. I’m not salary. I’m hourly. I get paid for overtime. My boss said that if I want overtime I can calibrate gauges after my shift.

Overtime for second means working into the wee hours.

And my sleep schedule was good this week.

That’s an issue. Rotating sleep patterns.

I’ll bring up OT on Monday. Wait. There’s an audit Tuesday.

Nvm.

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Turd wheel... - Mood:Good
Sunday September 15 20198:10:37 PM |
So my cousin moved into the area like five years ago. She’s about my age. She’s doing social work in the area.

It’s been a whirlwind of hanging out with her and meeting people and having parties. I got sucked into the world of an older guy cousin in the area for a spell as well.

Long story short, this cousin was dating someone for a long time. They are no longer dating. My cousin is now dating other people. The thing is that twice now she’s had me meet someone she was currently seeing.

What does that mean?

Is that normal? It’s been mildly awkward. They were both very nice people.

Just any advice as to whether or not I’m being fooled or taken advantage of. That personality test thing said I’m most concerned with self preservation. I don’t like people playin on my phone.

I might just be complaining about normal socialization.

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Four day weeks are better than three day weekends. - Mood:Good
Thursday September 05 201912:48:26 AM |
Turn on ESPN if you’re reading this. Or don’t. It’s not a big deal. The little Argentinian is fighting like a madman. That’s all you’re missing.

It’s very whatever it’s going to be lately. I can sympathize with this little man burdened by a dominant force. Battling back at the ever present onslaught. Chipping away to always fall short in stature and accomplishment.

Don’t bother turning on ESPN anymore. It’s over. The battle is lost. The greater conquered the lesser. The weaker succumbed to the stronger.

I’m just mumbling because I was denied entry to the place of imbibement. Not entry but access. Last call and the sort.

Match is over anyway.

Oh yeah. I only have to work for two more days one of which I am being paid on.

And I missed a psychiatrist appointment this morning.

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